Hello

Hey there. I don't know how many people are still using this blog but I thought that I could try contacting some of you through this. I was just wondering how everyone is doing and what you are doing with your lives. I am living in Mexico again wondering how I am going to be able to move back to CA with the costs of living and then what I will do with my life there. I have been thinking about going to nursing school instead of grad school because I have done some more work with midwives here in Mexico and I think that is where I want to go with my life. I have also been trying to figure out how I can do that but at the same time learn how to treat people but without all of the medicines that we use these days. Well that is a little bit about what I have been thinking lately. I hope that you are all doing well.

abrazos,
Meg

I am posting this poem by my sister, the lovely Abigail Smithson, at her request.

I am an ice cube alone in the ocean
I was awoken from sleep
Startled, I felt drowsy but excited
In your body
I was delicate as lace
But you were careful
Like water fills a lake
You gently washed against me
Drumming your mouth against my legs
Your arms were like clouds, gently sliding on the surface
Wanting and then gone, so early before the blue hit the sky
And now my delicate lace and I want to visit the lake

International Women's Day Goodbye Post!

Happy International Women's Day, ya'll! I hope you all are going out to celebrate. I, myself, am staying in to mark the occasion. It may appear that I'm inside and sober due to illness but actually it's for the holiday.

I also wanted to let you all know that this is going to be my last post for a LONG while, if not forever. Between school, work, research, and socializing, it has (obviously) become difficult for me to post lately. So I'm going to keep the website up for a while and see what happens but I'm not going to try to update it regularly. If you're interested in feminist writing/news check out Feministing.com.

Well I guess I will leave you with some personal news. I have accepted a clinical internship position at the Simmons College counseling center for next school year. Simmons is an all-women's college with an ultra-feminist counseling center where I will be doing individual and group therapy. It seems like it'll be a really great fit and I'm really excited and nervous about it! Wish me luck!

New Soul

I apologize for being a virtual mute in my posts lately. I'm just stressed to the max at the moment and haven't found the energy lately to blog. Next week I plan to be more on the ball so expect big things, ha. Anyway, to make up for it I've got yet another video. This one is beautiful and joyful and inspiring. I was thrilled to watch it tonight because it definitely lifted my taxed spirits. Enjoy.


Yael Naim - New Soul

Elections.

Thank you again xkcd.

Democracy is Happening

Undifferentiated Again?!?!?

Your Score: Undifferentiated

You scored 0% masculinity and 0% femininity!

You scored low on both masculinity and femininity. Your personality includes characteristics of both traditional sex roles, but your gender is not strongly defined.

Alright well I don't really get what Richard Simmons has to do with it but this is not the first time the Bem Sex Role Inventory has labeled me "undifferentiated". And probably not the last time either. The description may make it sound alright, but the meaning here is very different from androgynous (another possible outcome) which would refer to a person who scored high on masculinity and femininity. 0% masculinity, 0% femininity - do I have a personality?!?! Anyway if you want to see if you're a Richard Simmons or Arnold Schwarzenegger or Marilyn Monroe click here.

Shout out to Meg for immediately coming up with the name "Richard Simmons" from the clues: fitness guy in the 80's, seems gay, white with a fro.

Tribute to a Feminist Icon

Brilliant.

Gyno Stories - There's Still Time!

If you're in the Northeast, here is your chance to be a feminist star! You've got to send in your stories soon though because time is running out.

We are currently in production on a film called At Your Cervix. (Check out our website at www.atyourcervixmovie.com). We are seeking stories of women or female-bodied trans folks about gynecologists. The film takes a critical look at gynecology and the provision of breast and pelvic exams. Some gynecologists are absolutely amazing and have a way of making us feel comfortable, open and respected. Some gynecologists do the opposite and we are always amazed at the stories we hear of humiliation, disrespect and pain inflicted by many gynecologists. Our film aims to create a vision of what it can be like when the experience is a positive one and to end practices that leave patients feeling like they don't want to go back to a gynecologist because they have been so mortified or traumatized.

We are looking for people who are willing to tell their stories on camera, both positive and negative. We will be shooting these stories on Jan 26 or Feb 2 in New York City. If you or someone you know has a story to share, please contact us asap so we can discuss it with you and possibly set up an interview time.

Please respond to me, Amy Jo Goddard at amyjogoddard@yahoo.com and to our production manager Stephanie Dawson at SD@eclectionmedia.com.

Voting Pro-Choice

I had a dream last night that I was pregnant. Seriously. I was two and a half months pregnant and had just found out. Oddly enough I was sublimely happy about it but also very worried. For two and half months I had been drinking for two without knowing it! My kid was clearly going to suffer for it. In the dream I wasn't thinking about whether or not to have an abortion, but in reality I would definitely consider it. Not just due to the fetal alcohol syndrome but also the place I'm at in my life. My ability to support a child and raise him or her in a stable, responsible way is more than limited at the moment.

My reasons for voting pro-choice, however, are not just about my current circumstances. I vote pro-choice for all the women in this country who are protected by our right to choose. Choosing an abortion is not just about birth defects or money or age or time. The reasons for choosing an abortion are vast, too numerous to list here. To deny a woman her right to an abortion limits her power over her body and her life. It's a human rights issue. It continues the cycle of poverty, it denies violence and abuse, and it can lead to the death of adult women. Adult women have a beating heart. They have fingernails, they have hair, a fully developed brain, and they should also have choices.

For tons more Blog for Choice Day posts see today's Feministing.

Body Image is a Bitch

Another poignant truth (for many of us) artfully expressed by ASofterWorld.com.

Click on the pic for a larger image. Thanks Rebecca!

On My Own Two Feet

Manisha Thakor and Sharon Kedar wrote their personal finance smash hit, On My Own Two Feet: A Modern Girl's Guide to Personal Finance, for women like us. Women making some money but continuing to struggle with credit card debt, student loans, rent payments. This book is for us who studied humanities, literature, social sciences, linguistics not finance, business, or accounting. Written in compelling non-jargony language, this quick read can teach us all about how to get the most out of what we're making.

I saw an interview with Ms. Thakor on the news the other morning and I realized how ignorant I am about personal finance. My dad helps me with all of my finances and without him I'd be completely lost. I am definitely picking up a copy soon and I hope you all start thinking about it so that we can go on fun vacations together in the future!!

And finally, some words from the authors:

This book is dedicated to all women.

We wrote this book because the unfortunate reality is that the majority of women are not living from a position of financial strength. As a result, all too many women are experiencing financial stress in the present and financial hardship down the road. It doesn’t have to be this way! Learning a few simple yet powerful financial lessons while you still have time on your side will both increase your confidence today and your financial security tomorrow.

Check out this interview done by Feministing back in June for even more info.

untitled

riding through the bronx
the sign on the burger king is burned out
it just says Burge
a cross between Binge and Purge
Bad and Urge
how appropriate
how annoying

like you
on the bed
hands behind your head
legs spread
so beautiful and twisted
Void
and yet i seek you to fill me
beg you to till me

my skin is electric
and your hands
are
wet.

after
i flicker like the burger king sign
a jumble of contradictions
slowly burning out

No Shame

My dear friend and artist Nidhi Chanani brings us another great design that can be picked up at her store Small Hands Designs. She has over 350 designs with such categories as Queer, Desi, Politics, Veggie, and Music. Check it out!

What are you doing this weekend?

The Fetish Fair Fleamarket (TM) has a new home, and it's not just a hotel, not just a venue, but a whole city. From January 11th through 13th, 2008, the New England Leather Alliance will bring the biggest leather/fetish/BDSM event in New England to Providence, Rhode Island, where the event will take place in the Rhode Island Convention Center and three (or more) neighboring hotels.

Meg and I will let you know how it goes.

Oil & Water Meet Religion & Feminism

Sure you can be a feminist and be religious, as long as you don't read your holy text. In her article God Hates Women: Feminism and religion do not mix, Allison Kilkenny presents examples of misogyny from major religious texts.

...There is no room in religion for feminism, the doctrine advocating the equality of rights, social and political, with those of men. For feminism to work, it must exist outside of the constraining margins of religion. It must operate outside of the assumption that women are inferior to men, which is a foundational belief of the major theologies.

Pharyngula points out that Kilkenny does not mention female-centered religions like Wicca. I would like to argue that Wicca is not a major player when it comes to religion, however some folks estimate it to be the U.S.'s third largest religion by 2012. Huh.

Thanks Pharyngula!

Civil Unions, Domestic Partnerships, & Same-Sex Marriage, Oh My!

With the new civil union bill taking effect in New Hampshire as of January 1st, now seems like a good time to review same-sex marriage-ish laws like civil unions, domestic partnerships, and straight up same-sex marriage in the United States.

New Hampshire (2008) is the fourth state to approve civil unions along with Vermont (2000), Connecticut (2005), and New Jersey (2007). So what is a civil union? Essentially a civil union is a more conservative-friendly term for state-approved gay marriage. Civil unions provide same-sex couples with most of the same rights as other-sex couples. Of course these include the approximately 400 rights that the state provides but not the more than 1,000 provided by the federal government. Because of the Defense of Marriage Act, the federal government legally denies these rights to same-sex couples even if their civil union, domestic partnership, or same-sex marriage is recognized in their state. These 1,138 federal rights include hospital or prison visitation, the right to make medical decisions on behalf of partner, bereavement leave, access to health insurance and pension, social security survivor benefits, tax breaks, and veterans benefits. A complete description of all of the federal rights of marriage can be found here.

So what is a domestic partnership? A domestic partnership is a form of state recognized same-sex coupling that generally offers less rights than civil unions. However, in California and Oregon domestic partnerships offer the same rights as civil unions. This does not mean that there isn’t a catch. In California (2000/2005) for example, domestic partnerships are only recognized if one member of the couple is at least 62-years-old. Arbitrary much? And of course Oregon passed a domestic partnership bill last year that should have taken effect on January 1st, but court challenges are delaying the process. The states that offer domestic partnerships with less rights than civil unions are Maine (2004), Washington (2007), the District of Columbia (1992/2002), and in New Jersey (2004) for those, again, 62 and up.

My current state of residence, Massachusetts, is the only one that allows same-sex marriage as of 2004. Fun Fact: Iowa legalized same-sex marriage on August 31, 2007 but is awaiting further court review before allowing the law to take effect. Same-sex marriage is different than civil unions or domestic partnerships because it offers exactly the same state rights to same-sex couples. New Mexico and Rhode Island residents who are married in Massachusetts are recognized as married in their home state.

In summary, civil unions and domestic partnerships provide a different set of rights in each state. They tend to offer less rights to same-sex couples, especially in the case of domestic partnerships. Same-sex marriage is the only 100% equal marriage in the eyes of the state but, like civil union and domestic partnership, is not recognized by the federal government. Please feel free to provide any further information, corrections, or opinions about civil unions, domestic partnerships, or same-sex marriage in the comments.